every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
