and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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