guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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