She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
