When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
