Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
