I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
