Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
