yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize