i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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