He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
