i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Randomize
