You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
