He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
It was confusing and full of hummus
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
