I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
