Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
