Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
