As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize