I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
