is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
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