is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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