Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
