Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
