At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
