So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
