Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
where does the pee come out of this thing
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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