All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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