Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
