no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize