No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
