There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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