The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
