what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
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