i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
