of course. lets lasso hookers.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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