I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
