Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Randomize
