She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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