i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I showed him my bush... on skype.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Randomize
