I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize