Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Randomize
