So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
