can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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