you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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