? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
