dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
