Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
