The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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