anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
