I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
