He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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